The Wayward Scholar

[originally posted April 27th, 2018 on LinkedIn]

I’m often told to wait.

I’m told that to work in my community, to prosper and to reach my dreams all I must do is work really really hard and check a bunch of boxes. First, I was told that I would only need to work really really hard in grade school and I would see my dreams come true in the future. It turned out that I really needed to work really hard in high school and I could go to college and be celebrated and on a path to greatness. It was soon clear that all my hard work in high school would be rendered obsolete. The final promise was that all I would need is to work hard during college and the world would open up to me. I have found that this too, required me to have additional experience (even for entry level jobs) and in many cases an advanced degree. I wonder what else will be required on the other side? I am told that I only must wait and that I must keep going. It seems endless.

The general lesson is that patience is a virtue and all good things. I am also frequently reminded by colleagues that if you want something, all you have to do is ask. I do. I am told to wait.

This strategy has yielded too few opportunities, too few prospects for the future and I’m not nearly as close to some of my goals as I hoped I’d be. Following every rule and social commandment has only made me to feel trapped.

As a young, black man this seems to be one of the foundations of my existence. Along with being instructed to wait for professional growth opportunities, I am told I must wait to be treated with basic human dignity, for acknowledgement of my civil rights and for change of systematic oppression. It is difficult to wait when the need for the immediate has profound impact on day-to-day living and access to resources.

I do fault a system that only sees urgency in professional assimilation as a selfish need for professional development. In doing so, disregarding entirely the often equal or greater need for survival. In other words, we all pursue a multitude of opportunities with rigor because we want to work within a specific industry, we want to utilize our degrees and we want to meet our personal preferences for career advancement. It is also for compensation and benefits, which are required for food, shelter, health and fuel (an aspect that we do not publicly discuss enough).

I do also fault myself for some of my own passivity.

Why do we wait for someone else to give us permission to be great? How often are we checking off boxes on our own lists while we devote time to checking off boxes for someone else?

When you trust and believe that you deserve your dreams, then you will stop waiting for someone else to hand them to you. You can start today, right now.

I know that many of my heroes or role models did not achieve their dreams simply by waiting. Yes, they worked really hard but they also worked smart. We need to pave the way for ourselves and understand that working really hard does not look the same for everybody. Anything is possible if you do not wait for someone *else* to decide whether to give you what you know you deserve.

This is not about being impatient and it is not about minimizing the importance of building credentials and education. It’s about being proactive and passionate. It’s about feeling empowered to dictate our own destinies.

Circumstances will provide that many doors will remain shut. But this doesn’t suggest we cannot thrive in those doors that remain open nor does it suggest we cannot [still] reach for the stars or create alternative pathways. The idea of trailblazing can be apprehensive and sometimes it may require throwing out old advice and seeking new counsel. Finding empowerment in your strengths and talents and recognizing your value in this world is nothing to fear. Passion and tenacity can often be off-putting for people but this not about them. Its about me, its about you.

What are you willing to do today, so you can be who you want to be tomorrow?